http://www.blogger.com/logout.g Lex Petros: Vice In Theatres

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Vice In Theatres


(Warning! This posting may contain movie spoilers !)


One of the most anticipated rendition of the '84 TV series in movie form... apparently...

Two things: The director SUCKS and the storyline BLOWS!!!

I thought Michael Mann had lost his marbles directing this movie. I met with YB and David (and their missus) last Saturday to catch this one and BY the end of the movie, I was left to wonder whether was it an unforgivable waste of my precious Saturday night...I could have been blogging for example, instead of trying to register the contents of this silver screen version of Miami Vice...I must say, in contrast, directors and produces back then in the 80s knew how to make a cop drama... this movie was slow coupled with a bad script and wasted talents...

The beginning looked promising with Linkin Park's remixed version of 'Numb' played by the DJ and set against a typical Miami night club scene, complete with scantily clad women, drug dealers and of course, the Miami- Dade County Police undercover... then, things started to turn downwards...aside from a brief gunshot scene (2 FBI guys went down at the hands of 2, Barrett .50 caliber wielding snipers), not a single shot was fired after that for the next 40 minutes. During which time, I started to wonder if I should have just stayed home to watch CSI: Miami...at least the Horatio Caine 'gravitas' cuts over edge every time...


It's M-I-A-M-I for goodness sake!!! ... but seems that characters like to go to Havana, Cuba and Barranquilla...not to mention the typical druglord sequence. The scenes are more often than not, relegated to the late evening or night settings... No white sandy beaches with lots of bikini-clad women running around...No Sun. No Pina Coladas...and worst of all, No blood nor thousands or rounds of gunfire...disappointment wouldn't even cut it ...

Jamie Foxx really was under-utilised in this movie...he's job was to put on a menacing, serious cop face...an oscar recipient for 'Ray' but in this one...what the hell?!?!? was he doing?

Whereas, Colin Farrel, the stubbled-face with shoulder length hair didn't follow suit either... Both seemed like they needed a real good shag.. What's with the constipated look anyway? The original Sonny played by Don Johnson was certainly more suave and had more humour than this Alexander-potraying star...geez...what has Mann done??


A heineous and uncessary departure from the original Sonny Crockett and Ricardo Tubbs personae... All in all, POOR characted development and a BAD script ruined my expectations of these two characters...
Gong Li's appearance did not spice up this excuse of Miami VIce at all... I chortled everytime she open her mouth...talk about someone in dire need of "Engrish ressons"...but the funny thing is, she seemed to have spoke fluent Spanish in the movie...

I can't really remembered what happened in the end cause' I fell asleep just about there...when I woke up, guns were already a blazing in the purported fire fight.. not to mention (as pointed out by YB), a major FLAW during the fire fight sequence....MDPD marksmen had taken out 2 snipers where there were supposed to be THREE! So, the audience is left to assume that the other guy chickened out and left the scene before the shooting started...

My comment: Watch it at your own peril and bring a pillow if you do.


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