Logic and Love

A friend of mine recently got out of a love triangle involving a married person and another party. The person in question could not choose and ultimately made my friend leave instead of choosing between them. On top of that, the person in question was married and divorced by the same fidelity issues. What's more, the other party was mired with the delusion that all they be good friends despite being conflicted in their interests. ...

What a tangled web we weave...

I had a chat with my friend recently...Since we were both on the subject of love and relationships, I expressed beating myself for being able to make so many mistakes in the past and was shortsighted...not only to the one but moreso, I owed it to myself first to be the discerning one...

I have always pride myself for being able to make the right decisions and own my emotional faculties without exception...till the one came along...again... I asked... "

What happened to logic in all of this...for the both of us....if I couldn't see it....why didn't she?"

"Was both of us fooling ourselves and each other when the commitment issues on the outset were not certain?"

My friend's reply ..when a person is in love, all logic flies out the window... what's more...having the awareness of potential escalations and obstacles and plunging into it nonetheless... both of us were to live with the consequences of our actions... there should be no regrets ....it is futile to regret ... the choice was made and we only reap what we sow...

Then I asked... "So, I guess "love conquers all" is not true then"... To which my friend replied, " It's a lie"

I guess so... It's not enough and 'she' said it before...

My friend's counsel is no doubt harsh but true. We all live for each other but sometimes, we all have our own selfish reasons... whether it be to have someone to be a silver lining on a cloudy day or a companion to fill in the void, they may have been selfish to some extent... Why must we all long for someone so badly sometimes that we cast ourselves adrift in a sea of uncertainty...

What's sick about the entire thing... the realization of the illusion of happiness which beguiled ... completely overshadowed the probably downside and hurt which was to become... if only I were Vulcan... More than anything else, I look at myself these days and wonder what got into me... yes, I knew the circumstances and was dead sure I had all the solutions and the fortitude to overcome then... I was never a gambling man...and the stakes for this bet is way too high....

The past was one excruciating lesson I had to learn and is life changing, to say the least. I knew myself to be too idealistic at times... Many a times, I would listen to my heart and ignore my head... regardless of what everyone else tells me to do...and then suddenly ... reality abruptly violates that contentment ...

I suppose everyone is selfish in their own ways...'she' has no choice but to be selfish and so was I...unfortunately... our beliefs were unshakeable...and I believe this was the uprising of resentment.. too mired in our pain and loneliness of past relationships so much so, the first opportunity of filling the void...we took it...so much so I failed to realized or ignored the risk that we were setting ourselves up for sake of momentary bliss...

But looking at this from an outsider... I feel disgusted by the harsh realities but after dissecting the entire scenario...it's about how selfish we are or how much we are willing to sacrifice.... I can sacrifice my life but not my soul...the price of which was bought by the Prince of Peace ...it's too high of a price to sacrifice... I hate being torn in between but ultimately, love is nothing if it was not God led... for God is Love...