This is my prayer as the year ends...

I looked out from the balcony this evening... seems so calm and surreal at the same time...

The glistening red on the horizon invokes the setting sun... surely as it rises. As with all things on God's green earth, there is a beginning and the end...

I reflect upon the life and times of 2010 and ponder on the possible future looming just a few clock cycles ahead...

I am looking forward to a new year in which to set new goals and plot new journeys and yet I cannot wonder about the things and people I have left behind...in person and in memory... I have come to terms that our sojourn on this earth and the very moments we lived in had come to past for a reason or reasons which may at the time, be beyond our comprehension...

This is my prayer....

GOD, Grant me
the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change,
the COURAGE to what I can, and
the WISDOM to know the difference...

...this year has been life-changing and one which I shall not leave in distant memories as a constant reminder that we must become better than who we are and that all things are possible if you have faith in Him...

I will pray for 'you' and your precious one...that in that far away land , you will find the happiness and fulfillment that you have for so long yearned for...

Chronicles of Narnia 3: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (2010)

"Chicken", that's what Kenny called me when I refused to watch Chronicles of Narnia 3 with him last week...

Frankly, I treated the 3rd adaptation of C.S. Lewis' book with great circumspect, having been disappointed by CON1: Prince Caspian. I never did like a series starting off great like CON2: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, only to be sorely let down by a sequel undeserving of the epic-ness of "Narniaism".

This 3rd installment focuses of the youngest 2 of the Pevensies, Edmund 'The Just' and Lucy "The Valiant" Pevensie, both coming of age and exploring their adolescent life. The story starts with the siblings in England amidst the war, sepearated from Peter "The Magnificent" and Susan "The Gentle Pevensie, both who took flight to the United States whilst waiting for their parents' return.

I've always enjoyed the translocation scene to Narnia, the first being, well, self-explanatory ...a wardrobe cupboard, the 2nd, a train station and the latest, a painting the Dawn Treader coming to life, flooding a room where Edmund, Lucy and their obnoxious cousin, Eustace Scrubb surfaces onto the Great Eastern Sea in Narnia, surprisingly to be rescued by King Caspian (now) who commands the valiant ship...

From there, old friend united...the swashbuckling, pure-hearted mouse Reepicheep and Tavros, the light-hearted minotaur who serves as the Dawn Treader's 2nd mate...

Of course, no Narnia sequel would be complete without the wise and courageous Aslan the Lion, who reigned over Narnia for a century in winter's dead during the White Witch's dominance in CON1.. the White Witch was defeated by the Pevensie siblings after which a Golden Era was established for posterity...

The plot is simple, an evil power lurks, casting men and women into oblivion was it consumes all goodness and the 7 Lost Lords of Narnia whose swords must be united at Aslan's table to defeat the evil which looms... this is the exact formula needed for a movie of fantasy bearing good vs. evil...a "Never Ending Story" somewhat... coupled with high sea adventures, crossing swords and of course, the climatically triumph of good vs. evil, interspersed with bouts of self-doubt and temptations...

Eustace, an unbeliever of Narnian tales and an unwilling participant in this new quest, seen often times penning cynical entries of the days in Narnia was the right blokey, British comic relief...the chap literally went through a baptism of fire (being transformed into a fire-breathing dragon) after which, his bravery and courage tested. His doubting heart would soon be soften by the unlikely friendship with Reepicheep...both forging a friendship which could not be undone...

Courage, friendship and love...the indispensable values...

Suffice to say, I was glad watching this movie with lowered expectations and uplifted by the significant improvement over the last sequel which left me in disdain...

Pity Peter and Susan were not in this epic...the camaraderie of the last 2 adventures were legendary in their own respect...the battles in this one are no less watershed... I'd crave for more and wait for the 4th installment in anticipation, now that my hope has been restored... I think that C.S. Lewis' novels must not be undertaken unless you understand it takes more than good directorship to make the movie magic work....this time round, it was redemption...

I'll give The Voyage of the Dawn Treader a 6.5 out of a possible 10.

Football Holiday?!?! Hijacked! ... I tell ya

You know, it's as if our ten gazetted public holidays are not enough...now apparently kicking Indonesia' butt in the Suzuki Cup is justification enough to declare a last minute holiday on New Years Eve!


Yeah sure...we say everyone's taking it easy and clearing their mandates, but bear in mind the wheels of the economy doesn't stop spinning. It could not have come at a worse time as some of my fellow comrades in the legal fraternity found themselves hijacked and compelled to push forward deadlines leaving some of with a bitter after taste... kinda spoils the mood to usher the new year when you have your plans set out for last minute execution....a choice we sometimes have to take....

I am still working today...good thing I have a Citibank issued notebook computer in which all my work and precious notes are stored, for which I am using to complete all tasks for delivery on the 3rd of January 2011... after all, the Citi never sleeps...

Digressing, I did have a swell time catching up with my mate, Deanaharan Nair whose return from Perth could not have been better timing...the chap is one of the most intellectual fellow I've known...when Dean comes back from Sabah this Sunday, we plan to pay a visit to Suria KLCC to hunt for his Omega timepiece whilst I am likely to succumb to the lure of the Iphone 4 ...the force is strong with that one....

Goodbye 2010, you've been a bitter sweet year

It's the dawn of a new year, one I hope is a harbinger of better times and renewal of faith for me....

Being an avid Trekker, Captain Janeway's words resonate in my mind, constantly reminding me of the requirement to be use better judgment. She confided to her first officer, Chakotay:

"I made an error in judgment, Chakotay. It was shortsighted and it was
selfish, and now, all of us are paying for my mistake"

The underlying cause of wrong decisions and hurt is sometimes due to our immense altruistic nature as a human being revelling in self-indulgent, blind judgments which often at times bring about suffering... a lesson I am still learning...a lesson which should not have come to past, if not for my shortsightedness and failing to restrain....for an alternate reality would have been which could have brought a more favourable outcome...

I spend my days now seeking forgiveness and redemption... trying to undo the damage I have done and desperately salvaging a friendship which could have remained intact had I not acted on impulse and unconscionability...

..and yet I cannot help wonder about the life that might have been...

I am seemingly close to finding an absolution...though if I did...some things will remain unchanged in my heart...

I will leave it in the Hands of Providence to decide...for I shall relent and submit to His will...

Tron Legacy

...is sheer pointlessness personified and it's lacklustre character development left me tasting the eleven bucks I spent on this alleged highly anticipated sequel...

The vivid computer generated imagery is but a momentary sensory allure, only to be surpassed by the realization that the theme of father-son reunion coupled with the need for retribution has not revealed anything beyond expectation...a closure in that respect but that was all which beckoned its continuity...

... and what a waste to a beautiful score...the soundtrack is something I reckon I'd appreciate more.... for that, money would be well spent....

Go see the movie in 3D for its awe and wonder, so-called....

A 4.0 out of a possible 10 from me...

A time for love and peace....

I dedicate this message to my family, my friends and my loved one...

I pray the Lord God Almighty will show his light and mercy until all. This is the time commemorating God humbling himself with descending upon us and taking form of man, to fulfill the prophecy of the Messiah...

...Jesus was to die for our sins so that we may have everlasting life...a remission of our sins once and for all...there is no other love than this one... all anyone has to do is to just believe... not by deeds...just believe....

For God so loved the world,that He gave His only begotten Son,that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16

Not too long ago, I embarked on a journey which would proved perilous to me and the person whom I cared so much about. The conflict between right and wrong was implacable .... the one true person I owe my life to, I did not seek blessing from and hence the revelation of a lifetime... the experience is life-changing and I shall reflect upon it always to keep myself steadfast and faithful to Him.

When desires of the heart spurns our dereliction, it is the time when we have to go to Him to seek his permissive will... I too take comfort following my heart and I feel contented for the time being but soon after...

He spoke to me and told me it was not time...

I meant well but words proceeded unjudiciously... I was reaching out but ended up slashing out

...I only pray for your time to know...

Blessed Christmas to all... I pray that He will touch your heart as He has touched mine...

Appraisal Day......

I was starting to think my boss was too busy to appraise me...he had been swamped for the last month or more...

...my boss, Chee Ming, a 20-year veteran Citibank and our Country Legal Counsel...

my appraisal was scheduled last Friday and he told me in the evening that he was leaving for the day and said Monday was better....he was supposed to have been off last Friday but due to the impetuous nature of the job as Citibank's Country Counsel, he needed a couple more days....

Monday came....I had been stuck with the boys from Compliance & Control (C&C) and Wealth Management trying to draft and tweak up the most appropriate new-to-bank client's on-boarding letters and existing client risk disclosures in view of new investment policies by APAC Legal with direct orders from Citigroup NY....by the time I knew it, it was night and my boss had left..... :( *perplexed and worried....

I remember my ex-boss postponing appraisals on several occasions, only keeping me in suspense ...so I couldn't help but ask whether history was repeating itself?

...but I knew my current boss is very different....no matter what the tasks beckons....he will deliver....

and so...he called me into his room today...

my heart skipped a beat although, I was confident I could maintain a composed disposition in the presence of "the man behind the DESK" ....

A sigh of relief....my boss says he is happy that all business units I have serviced were all positive about me....save for him noticing a few silly, careless mistakes in drafting.... which called for the conventional assurance of exercising more vigilance ....

So, that was the impetus to push on pass my impending confirmation with "the Citi which never sleeps"......someone from IBIS told me if HSBC is "the world's local bank", then Citibank is "the world's GLOBAL bank"....*proud beaming smile!!

... it is indeed a new beginning..... God has seen me through...yet another year....

...my boss has taken the rest of year off, but not before posting an organizational-wide email informing that in his absence, my colleague, Mew San would be acting Country Counsel and in her absence, my other colleague whom I belong in the same team with, Yvonne Chin would be acting Country Counsel...

This means a little teasing....I went up to Yvonne and cheekily told her " since you are 2nd acting country counsel (at which point I mock-handed over my drawer keys to her) I am under instructions to hand over to you, the keys to our nuclear silos and the launch codes".....

Yvonne: ....

...the monotony of the day was abruptly interrupted by virulent laughter, suffice to say.....

Next target.....Mew San.... before I left, I wished her "good night",....took two steps and then back and said, "Oh ... I meant, good night BOSS!"....amused and by her impression, I could read that she had been the butt of every one's teasing when she said "You all are terrible!!!".... *grin

All in a days work and back home....straight to the gym....

Tron Legacy...

Another father-son drama, this time, 22 years after the original Tron, Legacy tells of a tale of Sam Flynn who is very much still haunted by his father (Kevin Flynn)'s disappearance finds himself transported to the same digital realm 20 years ago in which Flynn senior now resides.

Legacy will be in 3-D and I hear it boasts superior sight and perception. The trailers gives me the impression that the movie is too sanitized, but I will hold my reservations till movie day.

I've enjoyed watching a few father-son movies over the years:

Star Wars (Empire and ROTJ). Luke and Anakin Skywalker has etched deeply in popular cult. Good vs evil and the retribution of a man once championing the dark side.

Frequency. Dennis Quaid and James Caviesel in a temporal phenomenon of a sort enabling father and son to get to know each other when dad had passed on more than a decade ago. Remember the final scene when dad and son finally gets reunited when the timeline is altered. Funny how temporal paradoxes work.

Pursuit of Happyness (deliberately misspelled). If you recall that word on the daycare centre in which Will Smith sends Jayden Smith whilst struggling with poverty and homelessness. Based on a true story, this touching tale of how a father's sacrifice and tireless efforts pays off.

Tron Legacy hits the theaters on December 16. I doubt this will be a tear jerker, but I expect to be awed by the new range of CGI and 3-D technologies.

Life seems to be good to me. I have a new job at Citibank which I have settled in. The hours are almost the same as the previous one, but very manageable....they pay me well ...I don't have to drive to work anymore as the train station is literally a stone throw away....and yet....

My previous posts are but a shroud, hiding away the shame I faced, the truth about me and the one person I told I would not hurt ...

....the love who stood steadfast and unconditional for me.... the one that I failed ...again...

I do not want to put on this masquerade any longer.

I found in her all the happiness that I ever wanted ...and again.... I lost the very foundation of my life for the past year...

She has loved me, hated me and forgiven me but I have lost the most truthful and loving person I had ever met. What she said is undeniably true....she has done nothing but love me...

I constantly read and re-read her letters and emails...written from the heart ....there is no doubt about of the immeasurable pain I had caused....for someone whose every word are carved out of love, sincerity and selflessness...every letter I read drives the nail even deeper into my heart...

I am forgiven as I am told, but somehow, that leaves me with a deeper cut.... it drives into the very core....what grieves me more than my own failing is the inescapable truth that ...

she has let me go and there is nothing I can do about it now.... because I first let her go...again....forced her away....ran away... in any permutation, the same result.... she hurt because of me.... for which I hope to atone for someday...

I have hoped for our future together and in my doing so, the consequences from which now I must shoulder....

Origin of the word "starship"

This topic came up when a certain egotistical, Indian ex-colleague of mine brought up the word in the context of the 70's rock band who brought us unforgettable hits like "We built this city" and "Nothing's gonna stop us now". I could not resist but incite a debate on the origin of the word with me remarking "deep down, everyone is a Trekkie".

Now, a "starship" is a fictional (which may not be true in the near future) space fairing vehicle capable of tremendous speeds for interstellar travel, an indispensable nomenclature in a plethora of science fiction works.

We all know the most famous one of all, the Starship Enterprise.

In the realm of science fiction, certain quarters claimed it was Jules Verne (1828-1905) and who can forget "Journey to the Centre of the Earth" (1864) which has appeared in many remakes and renditions, "From Earth to the Moon" (1865) and of course, the adventures of Captain Nemo in "20,000 Leagues under the Sea" (1875). Nonetheless, it was quickly dismissed at the closest reference contextually is "extra-terrestrial".

Robert A. Heinlen (1907-1988) was also traced back as one of the first sci-fi authors who may have coined the word in "Starship Troopers" first published in 1959. Heinlen was one of the "Big Three" in science fiction with Arthur C. Clarke and Isaac Asimov.

The honor however goes to Harl Vincent (1893-1968) under the publication name of Harold Vincent Schoepflin, an American mechanical engineer and of course, science fiction author who was published regularly in science fiction "pulp"-quality magazine "Amazing Stories". The year was 1934.

It would have been almost inconceivable, even back in the late 19th and early 20th century to fathom interstellar travel. The closest star system that we know of is Alpha Centauri, located roughly 4.37 light years (4.51 trillion km) and probably visible with unaided eye (if you live in the Southern Hemisphere). It's astounding to know that the light we see originated 4.37 years in the past.

To give some perspective, the Cochrane warp chart will give you an idea of time vs distance against velocity.